When is it a year?

So, my birthday was a few weeks ago & it has left me with a lot to think about... When I'm really honest with myself, this was one of the worst years ever...Oh, don't get me wrong there were some really great moments too & things that I wouldn't trade for the world...But overall, not a great year.

But I'm stuck wondering...When do I consider a year a year?  It wasn't necessarily about being 30 that was the difficulty for me...But more along the lines of 2012... So, to say I'm starting fresh with a new year doesn't feel completely accurate.  Because 2012 is still looming over my head (and weighing heavy on my heart.)

I had a friend (I can't remember who...) who would get their calendars when school started because that meant it was a new year.  So, a year was virtually August-August.  (which conveniently coincides with my birthday!) ...But even that doesn't feel quite accurate.

And when I've thought about this in depth & detail...A year from January through January doesn't seem to fit either....Because some of the things that I've found particularly challenging & difficult this year, technically won't hit a year at that point.

So, it's starting to feel more fluid than sometimes I even think that it should be...Will I still make promises & resolutions when it comes to be New Years?  Probably (#betterlifechoices2012).  Am I thinking differently about my life in a new year of life?  Yes.  When anniversaries of difficult times/events roll around, will they still hurt. I'm guessing so.

I don't know when a year is up...My life is calculated by so many different measurements of time.  As corny as it may sound, the question from the musical Rent rings in my head... "How do you measure a year?"  In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee?  In inches, in miles?  Measure in love.  I'm going to try that...Even though I'm not completely sure what that looks like.  It's got to start sometime, right?  Why not start now?