Media Fast Reflections

Well, it's been a few days since my media fast officially ended...I arbitrarily decided that it would end when we dropped my friend Jeff off at the airport, because then it felt like our Sabbath retreat was ending.

Now, here's the honest truth...I used someone's computer to check my e-mail several times and I used my phone when I got in cell service. So, some may say that I cheated...I wouldn't disagree with you at all. Here's where I justify it: there were some communications that needed to happen for futher vacation plans and hotel reservations. Could I have done these without my cell or e-mail...Yes, but not as well and not as quick. So, although I knew it was not right, I did it anyway...I did not, however, peruse facebook or twitter until the breaking of the fast and I did not feel the need to catch up on news or blogs until this morning.

What did I learn?
It is much easier to participate in a media fast when I didn't have access to said media. Although it drove me crazy that I didn't have cell service, it was helpful because I then didn't try to use my cell and it comfortably sat in my purse most of the week...(except for that one time when it got taken away from me and I pouted...)

I also found it much easier to be on a media fast when those around me were also participating. I think I wouldn't have checked my e-mail had those around me also not checked theirs. I also felt this twinge of jealousy (maybe, not sure that's the right emotion) when others would announce status updates or laugh about things that they had seen on facebook...It would have made it much easier to be completely out of connection rather than limited connection.

Unintended consequences
I left my computer home for a reason...And I was planning on bringing the church computer with me in order to upgrade and work ahead on some media presentations. So, the truth is that I was planning on working during my vacation. Granted, this next week is not vacation as I am in class, but still...I was planning on working during my vacation. I was very nice to have that complete break from work and not think about it in terms of planning, but in terms of reflecting with my covenant group. It helped to give me more perspective rather than trying to fix a problem.

It made me more dependant on others...Well, it's still making me more dependant on others! I don't have a computer and I have some things that need to be done! So, I have to borrow others' or go to a public place that I can use a computer. It's amazingly frustrating! And yet it's lifegiving at the same time. I feel a sense of accountability when using someone else's computer. I don't feel as comfortable checking out the tabloid blogs or playing games, but instead make it much more about the task at hand and no side projects. It is very helpful to be focused and get things done rather than take my time.

I feel very disconnected...in both good and bad ways. Last night, Jenny asked me about a train wreck in IL and I didn't know anything about it...Well, turns out it was in Rockford--I know that area and my parents still live near there! I was very uncomfortable that I didn't know what was going on there, but also knew that had anything happened to my family, I would have known...But, it was not a comfortable place to be in. The same thing with the election in Iran. I feel like I know basics, but I don't want to engage in conversation because I don't feel like I know enough...And this would be something I would typically be interested in talking about! These are the pieces that make me most uncomfortable.

Being fully present was also something I was keenly aware of. I am typically someone who can figure out what a person is thinking or feeling based on the cues that they give, but I was even more aware without a computer or cell phone with me...The conversations that we had were deeper and more thoughtful because I felt that I could be fully engaged and not pulled in several different directions. It was very nice.

What are the spiritual lessons?
Let's be honest, there have to be some and I wasn't doing a media fast simply to do it...I came to realize that God and I haven't been on the best speaking terms...I've been talking and not listening...or ignoring all together. In the quiet of one evening, I heard God calling my name and I realized that I had forgotten what that sounded like...Not because God hasn't been calling my name, but because I stopped listening. I could list the reasons why I stopped listening and maybe I'll do that another post, but for now...I stopped listening to God calling my name. Did it have anything do with the media fast? Maybe, maybe not...Maybe it was being in a new place and new surroundings that helped with that, too. I can't help but think that not having my cell phone or computer to lull me to sleep was helpful.

I discovered that I can fall asleep without the TV or radio on...and there have been times that I have used the TV or radio to do my speaking with God...Not helpful. It is good to be back on speaking terms...

Would I do it again?
Yes...I'm contemplating making Fridays all day media fasts, which is something I've been toying with for awhile, but just haven't done...Mostly because I was scared and thought it was too hard. Well, the truth is that it is very hard and very scary (for me)...But so necessary...So, yes I'll do it again.

Poets, Prophets, & Preachers

I have 2 tickets/spaces available for Rob Bell's preaching conference July 5-7 available. Conference is in Grand Rapids, MI and more information can be found here. Tickets cost $125 + hotel costs. A group of 4 is already going, so expenses will be shared! 1st come, 1st served, please let me know ASAP!

Rob Bell: Drops Like Stars Tour! **Re-post**

Well, here it is folks! I got the info about the Drops Like Stars tour hitting Chicago on August 19th at 8:00 pm. Tickets are 16.50 and are general admission. I know that I've talked with some people before about wanting to go and I'm interested in going again (3rd time's the charm?). So, if you'd like tickets, let me know and I'll place the order and we can work out carpooling or meet-up as you'd like.

You can comment here, e-mail, facebook, DM on twitter, or text...Totally up to you!

Media Fast

So, out of some of the conversations at Annual Conference, one person in particular asked me if on my Sabbath Retreat I would be taking my cell phone. "Of course!" I replied and joked about possibly taking a media fast away from computer/e-mail/social networking/cell/etc... "But, I don't think I'm going to, because let's be honest!" To which the response was: "I would encourage you to do so."

Now, my reaction to that was: "Oh my God, no! That's crazy!" Which meant that this is something that I need to do. When I've told this to a few people, I've gotten varied responses...some have said, "that is great, we'll do it with you" and others have said, "but what if I need to get in touch with you" or "I'll miss your posts!"

So...here's the deal. For an undetermined amount of time, I'm participating in a media fast. I'm not sure how long and what will be included beyond facebook, twitter, the internet and some e-mail. My cell phone will remain with me, but as long as I am with my covenant group, that will be monitered to unsure no work happens other than the work I need to do with God on my soul.

If you need to get in touch with me for emergency purposes, my cell phone will be the best way to get in touch, but please be patient with slow (or lack of) response. If it is not an emergency, but it's still info you want/need me to have-- go ahead and e-mail! I'll check that occasionally, but with no regularity and with limited response.

I don't know what this is going to look like and I'm not going to lie, I'm freaking out about it a little bit...But, I'm going to do it. So, please pray(!) and drop some notes/comments/texts/etc... of encouragement...Even if I can't read them right away, I will read them and will need them.

I bet you think this post is about you...

As I was in conversation with a few people yesterday, I was sharing about my upcoming Sabbath retreat & class. I am beyond excited about this and so ready for a break and a chance to renew my soul. It is beyond needed and a big reminder for me to work on being better about self care and being more intentional about caring for my soul as a long term solution rather than extended blocks of time. I'm working on this.

At Annual Conference, I had several people come up to me and share that they knew me from facebook and appreciated my posts. Honestly, at the 5th person, I continued to be surprised that there were people who actually paid attention to what I said and did! Yikes! I love being able to use social media like twitter, facebook, myspace (not as much anymore), and my blog to be able to share what I'm thinking, feeling, pontificating, etc...I'm intrigued by what social media is doing to our culture and what will happen with it. In the meantime, I'm taking full advantage of using it, for better or worse!

What I will be clear about in terms of social media is that what I post is always about me...My reactions to situations, my thoughts, my journey, my experiences, my life....I say this because I have had someone recently imply that I was talking about a particular individual in a status update. No...they are typically about me. I am not passive aggressive enough to post a status update/blog post to chastize an individual. Typically if a quote/lyric/rant is posted, it means that it is coming at me from several angles and not just from 1 or 2 people. So, if you identify yourself in any of my posts, don't necessarily think that they are about you. Remember the Carly Simon song? "You're so vain, I bet you think this song is about you..."

I am grateful for those of you who are stopping by this blog in whatever fashion you're reading! From the statcounter, I see folks stopping by from all parts of the country, but those in the Northern IL area are certainly higher! Please drop a comment so that we can get to know each other really rather than through your IP address & location! If doing this is about connecting, I want to connect outside of the blogosphere! (I moderate comments, so if you want to leave your name/e-mail address/phone/etc..., I can make it so that it is not public!)

Thanks for reading/caring/visiting! I can't wait to share with you all what I learn from my class!

I heart Stephen Colbert

More reason why I love Stephen Colbert: He really puts his word behind what he does! Operation Iraqi Stephen: Going Commando in full effect!

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Obama Orders Stephen's Haircut - Ray Odierno
colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor Stephen Colbert in Iraq

Saved By the Bell!

So, in watching this interview, I LOVED it!! Saved By the Bell was one of my favorite/best shows! So, Jimmy Fallon seems to fall into my generation? Anyway, with all of the Saved By the Bell references in this interview, I wonder how many people actually got them because they weren't familiar with the show? I loved this...Zack Attack forever


**I can't get the video to embed here, so check out: http://www.latenightwithjimmyfallon.com/blogs/2009/06/zack-attacks-late-night-signs-on-for-the-reunion/**

Annual Conference

Annual Conference work continues! For up to date coverage, follow on twitter using the tag: #umcnic.

If you're not a twitter person, check out the website: http://umcnic.org/

Drops Like Stars: August 19th

Well, here it is folks! I got the info about the Drops Like Stars tour hitting Chicago on August 19th at 8:00 pm. Tickets are 16.50 and are general admission. I know that I've talked with some people before about wanting to go and I'm interested in going again (3rd time's the charm?). So, if you'd like tickets, let me know and I'll place the order and we can work out carpooling or meet-up as you'd like.

You can comment here, e-mail, facebook, DM on twitter, or text...Totally up to you!

Exiles...

One of the books that I'm expected to read for the class I'm taking in a couple weeks is called Exiles: Living Missionally in a Post-Christian Culture...And it's got me all kinds of riled up...At first, I thought that it wasn't really any new information and to a certain extent, I don't think that it is compared to some of the things that I've read in the postmodern genre...With the exception that this seems to be based in a bit more theological grounding and orthodoxy.

I've read about 1/2 of it so far and I know that it's not fair to judge it or to discuss it without reading the entirety of the book, but I must say that I greatly appreciate Frost's critique and criticism of the church. Exiles are the people who have grown frustrated with the traditional church and some who have left the traditional church and some who grow increasingly frustrated within traditional church. What I clearly hear him say that I haven't heard from others is that traditional church is not "bad", but may be at this point misguided. However, there are pieces to traditional church that speak to some people, but as the exiles grow more and more frustrated with traditional church, there may be more leaving and forming different kinds of faith communities.

I hear very clearly some of the echoes of George Barna's book, Revolution--Now, I reflected on Barna's book a couple years ago and I really, really disliked it. I felt that it was a book that was calling the church irrelevant and unnecessary...I still think that the findings were a bit harsh, but in light of Frost's book, I can see what he was saying a bit clearer and with different eyes.

In the part that I have read of Frost's book, I've really appreciated and I've been thinking a lot of what it means for the context that I currently serve. I'm still not sure and I am very excited about what will be discussed in class because I know that much of it will be applicable (hence why I wanted to take it...). What I struggle with in Frost's book is not how much should be applied to any and every context, but how much of it fills my soul right now in a time when my soul is not well...I get excited to hear that there are others who are feeling the way that I feel and that there may be some ideas to consider to work at building the kingdom of God-- to make disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world.

It is exciting and encouraging and helpful to keep that reminder-- that the business of the church is to make disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world. I think that many traditional churches have forgotten that and have focused more on maintaining the institution rather than making disciples...Because to be quite fair and honest, making disciples of Jesus Christ is a difficult task and one that carries much responsibility and obligation...There are also not many clear determining factors, and it's not a linear process, but it's organic and ebbs and flows based on personal dimension and individuals...It's easier to focus on the things that are linear and unchanging...But that is not what we are called to-- we are called to make disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world.

The other tension that I have within me is that I am one who has dedicated their life to the church because God has called me there...And there are parts of me that grimace when I think about the changes that would need to be made and what it means should all of what Frost is proposing truly happen...I don't think that it's helpful to throw out all of tradition (and that's not what Frost proposes either), but to be mindful of tradition and bear in mind the pieces that are maintained for tradition's sake and the pieces that are a part of the Tradition of Jesus Christ.

Much of what Frost writes, I have thought that small-membership churches could act on these things very easily and my dreams begin to flourish again! How amazing would it be to have a commited group of believers who want to live out their faith in new and creative ways in order to make disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world?!?! There are endless possibilities and there is potential and possibility....the challenge becomes when the focus ends at maintaining an instution and fails to look outside and unfortunately many cognregations are at that place. Hence the tension and struggle.

Michael Slaughter has said that "God does God's best work in a cemetary." Sometimes something needs to die in order to be resurrected. The Church has been around for more than 2,000 years and there is a reason why the Church is still around, but it has not been without new movements and reformations and protests...In order to be a viable witness in the world, the Church must continue to evolve and seek and pray and witness...To make disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world.

Pepsi Throwback Vs. Pepsi

When I first heard about the "new" Pepsi flavors coming out, I was super excited! Now, I don't like Pepsi, but I started drinking Pepsi from the glass bottles when I was a baby (I have the pictures to prove it!)...My dad is a Pepsi drinker hardcore and it was just natural! A couple weeks ago, I started my quest to find Pepsi Throwback to no avail...Maybe I just didn't look hard enough? Anyway, I was in B-Town yesterday and my parents had some Throwback so, I did a test...Then I found a 20 oz at Shopko and was able to do a comparison taste test! Here are my results...

Pepsi Throwback: Not as sharp in flavor, and I don't think it's as carbonated either...It's surprisingly smooth and light. My dad said it should bring back memories because that's probably what I drank as a baby! I really liked it. Pepsi Throwback is made with natural sugar and no high fructose corn syrup and my gosh can you tell a difference!!

Pepsi: Honestly, after drinking Throwback, this made me want to spit the drink of Pepsi out! It was so heavy and really syrupy. Things that I didn't notice when I've had Pepsi in the past, but right next to each other you can really taste it...I didn't care for this at all and while I'm not a huge Pepsi fan in general, this just sealed the deal!

I hope that they continue to make Pepsi Throwback because I am a fan and I would consider buying!

Stuff...

I ran across this quote while doing my morning bloglines scan of blogs that I currently subscribe to...Now, sometimes I read them all and sometimes I take a look at the first few lines then move one. I was in a scanning mood this morning, but this quote from the blog Conversations that Matter stopped me..."Sometimes we think that the color of the carpet is more important than the people who walk on it."

Wow...How true is this and I wonder if it is a statement that only churches ponder...I mean, does a corporation really care or do they even have time to deal with these questions? And I suppose "color of the carpets" could be interchanged with any other small detail kind of issue rather than focusing on the big picture.

I was having a conversation with a friend earlier this month who had recieved some criticism for changing an office procedure. The procedure made things more economical and was really the best decision, but she recieved a label from others that was unflattering and unacceptable. Now, why cling to something that is intangible and can be worked around and through and throw barbs at an individual who is doing the best job that can possibly be done? Why is the color of the carpet more important that the person walking on it?

I also think that we have no idea what is going on in others' lives and often make assumptions based on what we think we see. There is always more happening underneath the surface than meets the eye. I personally find it frustrating, especially when someone will say one thing to my face and something completely different to another, but I have come to realize that I can only deal with what people are willing to give me. I try really hard not to jump based on rumors or gossip, but there are times when it happens. But in all cases, there is something going on that individuals don't want people to have access to...Which makes things that much more difficult. Does one ask, "Gosh that person who ran the red light must have an emergency, I hope everything is okay?" or "What an idiot!" There is usually something else going on...

But we hide everything so well in order to save face both with others and I think to ourselves sometimes. Because if someone knew what was really going on, it becomes real and not just something that is in my mind...What would happen if we approached people with this assumption, or with a truly, "innocent until proven guilty" mindset rather than a react first, ask questions later mindset? What if we cared about the people walking on the carpet rather than the color of the carpet?

I don't suppose that I have one specific situation in mind over this question, but rather a collection of incidents over the course of the last 8 years or so...I'm growing weary of it as well...I have heard from friends who have chosen to totally leave the church because of the way that church members have treated them and reacted and it makes me incredibly sad that the Body of Christ has abused people to the point of their desire to no longer be a part of the Body. What does that say about the Church? I suppose this comes in reaction to several of my friends who have chosen this route because they have been so abused by the church and to be fair, the places that are abusive are not the church, but they claim the name in a perverted way. Maybe they think that they are, but well...I don't remember Jesus being abusive, but if you have Scriptural reference, I'm willing to entertain that notion...

I recently heard Adam Hamilton say that in order to evangelize, one needs to ask these three questions first: "Why do people need Jesus Christ?"; "Why do people need the church?" ; and "Why do people need this church?"...I think those are great questions and important for each and every congregation to answer. I think for me personally, I am starting to fall in line with a majority of my generation in saying that I love Jesus and I believe people need Jesus, but I'm starting to fall out of love with the church....Not the Body of Christ, but what church has become.

I suppose that a good majority has to do with my feelings of burning out...I have very poor habits in self care and need to do much better about that. I am entering into a time of vacation and training and I can't tell you how badly my soul needs it. I hope to come back from that invigorated and ready to tackle the challenges and move forward. I can't continue to do what I'm doing while I'm running on empty...

Ty Inbody's quote still speaks volumes to me, "Any Christian that does not love and hate the church at the same time simply does not understand the church." I wish that I didn't understand the church so well...And please be very clear that I am not talking specifically about one singular congregation, but the church as a whole, but knowing full well that the church as a whole does include particular congregations. I am speaking from my personal experience in congregations as well as my perception and hearing from others' church experiences...It is incredibly difficult for me to say that I don't have one particular instance or congregation in mind because really these are my thoughts and my experiences. And as such, congregations and instances have factored into that.

I still very much believe that people need Jesus Christ....I still very much believe that people need the Church...I just wonder when the church will realize that.