One thing I’ve Never Heard Someone Talk about that has changed everything to me
Rob Bell
Rob Bell
“Chocolate covered turd”
looks pleasing until you take a bite…
“Mixed blessing”
Difficult to shake
even with noble intentions—limp away
The 9 and the 1
10 pieces of feedback
9—amazing/positive
1—negative
walk away with the 1…
Not just content of negative—should be able to shake…
Acts 21
4,000 revolting terrorists
Friends can laugh it off, but it’s about me…
Inner dialogue
wobbly
tape that plays
Comments that are not conversation
“you look so skinny…”
Leadership—open self up to criticism
“The official committee for doctrinal purity, orthodox rhetoric and general theological correctness”
self appointed, of course…
Timing is off…
right after a sermon/something big
Beaten down…
big things
Death by paper cuts
easy to name exhaustion/burnout from big things
even more painful—little things
build up
adds up until we don’t know it…
As a result…
Hold back
Hold back
took a few shots and make us think twice
If I put myself out there…
prophetic edge—back off
back off creative
once you share something personal, it’s public and it becomes everyone’s
callous builds up
Lists/labels
“those people”
Keep them back
to protect ourselves
based on perceptions
Revenge
passive
I don’t feel like giving my best
punish
withdraw
Active
“I’ve had some conseling appointments with them…”
causing harm
In order to stay in the game/continue to have something to say…
Become masters of forgiveness
actual people in actual church
for comment/email/off handed comment
Can’t just be a student
Name the wound
“I don’t get to control how people respond”
That’s just where they are and here’s where I am and that’s just the way it is.
“That hurt”
get to the heart of it
exposure/analyzed
Forgiveness—letting go
Sheep have teeth and they use them…
Proverbs 26:11
Some people are toxic and you don’t have to be there when they return to their vomit
Okay to have boundaries with toxic people
especially with toxic people
Can be an ocean of compassion and grace and have boundaries
Titus 3:10
warn divisive people once and warn them a 2nd time
You are not an ecclesiastical punching bag
You are a resource
You are a gift
Congregations take their unhealthy out on you because they pay you
Luke 12:13
I’m tired of people like you…
It’s not my job
JC clear about who he is
Okay to guard resource to point people to resurrection
We spend a disproportionate hours on people who don’t have an intent on following JC anyway…
Love your neighbor as yourself
There’s got to be a better way
Okay to say—I understand you have vested interest in this, but because I have been charged with these tasks, I have to say no…
Forgiveness is being freed from
has a cost
involves a pattern
death into resurrection
death is painful…
Luke 23
suffer agony of wound
this hurts because…
Go all the way to the bottom of it and it hurts
will lead to resurrection
Tim Keller
Forgiveness means refusing to make them pay for what they did
Absorbing debt
Yes, but is a death that leads to resurrection instead of life long living death of bitterness and cynicism
These people are humans and humans do things
but JC invites us into a new humanity
Parker Palmer
The cross says “the pain stops here”
The way of the cross is a way of absorbing pain not passing it on, a way that transforms pain from destructive impulse into creative power.
When JC accept the cross, his death opened up a channel for the redeeming power of love.
Freed from identity wrapped up in how it is received
Give gift that God gave
Practice it—Christ pattern
Who do you/I need to forgive?
Encounter?
Church?
Committee?
Loud layperson?
What commitment?
Do I need to wake up?
System killed wonder & awe
Playing by party line/rules
sold out
job vs. disciple
Restructuring time/schedule
Reclaim art of sermon

